I think the session on releasing repressed emotions really kicked in the next day because I was triggered by something that was said to me and it just stabbed right through my core. I found myself sobbing away and realized that these emotions were still tucked away inside my body. They had come up before and I'd forgotten about them, but here they were again in full swing. Maybe some of you will be able to relate...I'm sure I'm not alone here. After 3.5 years of pretty constant treatments and now feeling finally stable, I had this strong emotion of 'not feeling good enough,' my body has been broken and it's still not good enough and not loveable. As strong surges of wavelike emotion kept pouring through me, I wrote, went for a short walk taking in the fresh air, followed along to some livestream Qigong (perfect timing!), and then arrived at day 9.
So the meditations were a welcome relief to my body and soul. On the second breathing meditation, I went off for what felt like a long time and then I remember feeling so incredibly peaceful and buoyant as I was reclining on my sofa, noticing the intense silence and then suddenly I had the thought of, 'I wonder when we're going to the chanting exercise, this feels like a long time?' I opened my eyes and saw that my computer had completely shut off. It doesn't do this. So I quickly managed to get back onto the zoom site in time to finish the worksheet.
In my breakout room one of the lovely ladies there said to me, 'it knew to turn off and give you this deeply peaceful experience, just what you needed.' I thought, exactly! I'm having some very interesting things happen this week as the energy builds from all of us meeting and sharing.
I'm very appreciative and full of gratitude for what all you amazing women have created for us and the people it's brought together. Very powerful!